I’m thrilled to share this guest blog post by my friend Dr. Kelsey Alford, DNP, CPNP-PC, and Owner of Nested Sleep! If you’re expecting or in those bleary early days of newborn life, this one’s for you!

Hi, I’m Kelsey, nurse practitioner, mama of two, and owner of Nested Sleep. I help new parents get the sleep they need through evidence-based sleep education and 1:1 sleep support. I’m excited to chat with you below all about what you can learn and set up before your little one arrives!

As new parents we prepare a lot during pregnancy. From setting up the photographer, to packing a birth bag, it can be a joy to plan for your little one's arrival. As you are prepping, the one thing you’ll hear both on neighborhood walks or during your baby shower is “get your sleep now because you won’t be sleeping well again for a very long time!”.

I’m here to help you plan a bit for healthy sleep so that period of sleep deprivation won’t be as long and overwhelming. After all, we want to be able to be present during the postpartum period – not running on coffee and energy drinks!

Newborn Sleep Basics

Newborn sleep looks very different from adult sleep, and that’s by design. In the earliest weeks, babies spend a much larger portion of their sleep in REM (active) sleep, which is essential for brain development, but also means sleep is lighter and more easily disrupted. This is why newborns wake frequently and may seem restless, noisy, or hard to put down.

Naps are short and plentiful, often happening around the clock, and that’s completely normal. Because sleep periods are brief and frequent, contact naps are not only okay in the newborn stage, but they can be incredibly helpful for regulating a baby's nervous system and allowing them to get the rest they need while their sleep cycles mature. Just make sure caregivers are awake while holding and alert when holding the baby during their sleep.

At the same time, one of the most important foundations for newborn sleep isn’t actually sleep at all, it’s feeding. Whether you’re breastfeeding, bottle feeding, or doing a combination of both, prioritizing effective, comfortable feeds helps support longer and more settled sleep periods. Newborns wake primarily because they need to eat, so ensuring feedings are going well can reduce unnecessary fussiness and help babies transition back to sleep more smoothly. In these early weeks, it’s less about creating a perfect sleep schedule and more about supporting full feeds, adequate intake, and a rhythm that allows both baby and parents to rest whenever possible.

Setting up the nursery and sleep spaces

When you are making that registry keep in mind that your sweet babe will be spending the first few months in YOUR bedroom. In fact, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends infants should sleep in the parents’ room, close to the parents’ bed but on a separate surface designed for infants, ideally for at least the first six months. Their sleep surface can be a bassinet, SNOO, pack n’ play or standard crib.

In addition to having a bassinet it’s helpful to have a number of items that you’ll need overnight close by such as:

Swaddles (Velcro or Zipper): They can help with the startle reflex and since we want to avoid any soft objects or loose bedding in your baby’s sleeping area. Have a bunch of these since they will get covered in spit up or poop often! Stop swaddling as soon as your baby shows any signs of trying to roll over.
Night light for those midnight feeding sessions to keep the room dim (this helps the baby start to know the difference between days and nights). More on night lights here: https://nestedsleep.com/lets-talk-night-lights-for-babies-and-kids/
Diaper caddy and changing pad. Many people have the changing table in the nursery which is good, but you’ll also want a portable changing pad for your room and to move around the house.
Snacks for the parent doing feedings, believe me you’ll get hangry overnight! The supportive parent can do a lot to prep going into the night, more on that here: https://nestedsleep.com/how-to-involve-your-partner-in-baby-and-child-sleep-care/

Button: Need a nursery checklist, grab a free one here: https://nestedsleep.com/sleep-resources/

How to get your baby on a schedule

So much about parenthood is unpredictable. From pre-conception to your birth plan, it usually doesn’t follow a predictable pattern. It’s a challenge, especially for a Type A mama like myself! But the good news is that the development of your baby’s first schedule, or their circadian rhythm, does have a pattern.

The development of the circadian rhythm does not fully occur by birth, but rather it really starts kicking into gear by about 2-4 months of age with starting to produce and secrete melatonin (this tells your baby they should get sleepy in the evening). (Yates J. The long-term effects of light exposure on establishment of newborn circadian rhythm. J Clin Sleep Med. 2018;14(10):1829–1830.). Up until this time the most important thing you can do as a new parent is to support their body clock.

Supporting the development of your baby’s first schedule:

Light exposure (especially in early morning hours)
Play during the day (tummy time, dancing together, smiles, laughs)
Mom’s diet and breast milk when breastfeeding (if pumping be sure to label bags day vs night): Mamas make sure you have a relatively predictable sleep schedule as your melatonin is passed onto your baby. Try to go to bed and wake within 1-2 hours every day.

Plan your support team

Just as you plan out your OB/Midwife and doula team it can be helpful to plan out how you will support your rest. Some things to think about is who will be taking parental leave and when? Over the last few years I’ve noticed an increase in fathers taking some of their paternity leave in order to prioritize sleep for their families. In addition to taking some leave early on post birth, or adoption, many dads are using the time moms are going back to work, post-maternity leave, to sleep train their babies and prioritize sleep for the whole family. So if your partner can stagger their parental leave that can work really well!

Postpartum doula support can also be a really good fit for your family if you don’t have a lot of family closeby, your partner doesn’t have a lot of parental leave, and/or you need daytime or nighttime support. A postpartum doula is often trained in caring for both the mom and the baby and can offer a variety of services to help you rest and heal after birth. Find a good fit for your family over at the Heybrook here.

Lastly, chat with a sleep specialist! Knowing who your village is even before having your baby can be so helpful. I offer free 15 minute prenatal consultations (or after the baby is born too) to chat about all the sleep support I offer and decide what support is best for your family. You can book a free call here: https://nestedsleep.com/discoverycall/

What Parents Often Don’t Know and Wish They Did

One of the biggest surprises for new parents is that newborn sleep challenges are not a sign that something is wrong, but rather they’re a sign that development is unfolding exactly as it should. Newborns wake often, day and night, primarily because their stomachs are small and they need to eat frequently. This isn’t something to “fix” or train away in the early weeks. In fact, expecting long stretches of sleep too soon can create unnecessary stress and self-doubt. Understanding that frequent waking is biologically normal can be incredibly freeing for parents navigating those first foggy weeks.

Another thing parents often wish they knew sooner is that more structure doesn’t always mean better sleep, especially in the newborn stage. Tracking sleep and feeds can be helpful, but only when used as a tool for awareness rather than perfection. Many families find it reassuring to use simple sleep trackers to notice patterns (like when a baby is naturally sleepiest or how feeding impacts rest), without feeling pressure to hit exact numbers. If you’re curious about tools that can support — not overwhelm — this process, I’ve shared a breakdown of the best baby sleep apps and trackers that can help your baby sleep better on the Nested Sleep blog.

Finally, parents often don’t realize how empowering it can be to learn what normal newborn sleep looks like before a baby arrives or even in the thick of it. Education doesn’t make the nights magically easy, but it does make them far less confusing. For parents who want a clear, science-backed roadmap, I created a Newborn Sleep Guide that walks through expectations, feeding and sleep rhythms, and how to support rest without rigid schedules. As a loyal reader I’m offering 50% off my newborn sleep guide (use code NEWBORN when purchasing)!

About the Author

Dr. Kelsey Alford, DNP, CPNP-PC is a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner with training in sleep medicine and the founder of Nested Sleep, where she helps families build healthy sleep foundations through evidence-based, developmentally appropriate support, that goes well beyond the stock advice you’ll get from late night googling. You can find her here: https://nestedsleep.com/